Week NIIIINNNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I must say that this has been one of the harder weeks that I have experienced. Not because of anything that had to do with how the children behaved or anything strange that happened at school but because of the fact that it was my last week at this school and I have grown so attached to each and every one of my students. I have grown not only my students, but also my main mentor teacher, Ms Jooste, whom I sat with every single day of the past 2 months. I will miss her dearly. She has always been so helpful and accommodating towards me, and made me feel welcome in her classes (even on her sleepy days!).

With a heavy heart I feel that although I’m sad that I will be leaving I feel the time really has come for me to get back to campus. I miss being in classes and being a carefree youth(?). I miss having a choice whether or not I will attend a certain class (haha!) and I miss being able to walk to a coffee shop whenever I wanted to. I also miss my lecturers! I’m just in a state of deep introspection at the moment because of all the emotions that have been running high this week.

Like I said previously, I loved being at this school but I feel that my time here is through. This is not because of how the teachers treat us, but because of the conflict that has been erupting amongst us student teachers. I sense a certain aura of cabin fever that has descended upon us and this indicates that it’s time to go. I built many beautiful relationships with quite a few of my fellow students and we had many things in common being at this school together and engaging in the daily struggles of a student teacher.

I’ve learnt a lot about myself in this past period of time too. This time has taught me to be able to address conflict and speak up when something is not okay. It has taught me to be able to get along with other people whom I work with and to be able to manage my time effectively. I have been taken out of my little bubble of a world and shaken and prodded violently by the reality of what goes on in schools. I have become a bit more of a harder, stronger person by seeing and experiencing things that I never thought was possible to experience within a school environment. I have even gangsterism and drugs, violence and sweet children who really are the best damn things I have ever seen. I have learnt how to engage with other people from other cultures and even learnt quite a bit of Xhosa!

This week in terms of work has been very relaxed because I have completed all my lessons and observations so the work that I had to complete was minimal; I only had to have a few things signed by teachers I worked under. I used this week as time to soak up the experience without having to worry about things that I had to do. I spent time with the children I enjoyed being around and got to make jokes with them because of the fact that I am not their official teacher anymore.

We had cultural day this week and aside from the slight organisational issues, I enjoyed it so much, and so did the learners I taught. They loved the dance and the hall was full of people who wanted to see their children take part. I find this community to be quite tough but also endlessly endearing and I will miss e\forming part of it. The girls I taught came and gave me a chocolate to say thank you for helping them out with the dancing, which I really appreciated. I am able to leave this school knowing well that I have made my mark, and it’s a positive one!

I'm turning into the Grinch, I swear.

SO! Second last week, and what a week it was. We saw the grade 11 ball happening this week which was the highlight of my week. At the ball the learners were assessed for their life orientation marks for line dancing and I could see they all enjoyed this every much. They got dressed to the nines and brought food and had a jolly good time, even though their grade 11 ball was at 10 – in the morning! They all looked so stunning! This week was one of those weeks where I really felt so absolutely out of place in that school. The kids were scheduled to write their test week so there were absolutely no classes, and all they did was sit in class and study, which I found to be very odd. Also, as students, we were unable to use these days for teaching and getting in lessons because the learners were busy studying and writing tests, which set many of us back in terms of completing the amount of lessons we had to complete. They gave the children more than two hours every day to study and called it exactly that – as if those children need any more reason not to study at home and come prepared! A lot of the children ended up just leaving their studying at home to come study at school but the classes ended up so noisy because of how difficult it is to control a class where they are not being taught and they have to “study”. Sometimes I feel like the people who run the school do not think and simply do it because it’s what’s easiest for them. Heaven knows these children don’t need another week of doing nothing in class. I feel like I’m sounding very jaded at the moment – like an old aunty – and to a very real extent I am jaded by my experience at the school.

Don’t get me wrong, I learnt a lot from being at the school, but 9 weeks is a long time. I feel like my time at the school is wearing thin and as though my space in class is getting smaller. As the days go on I feel like I’m getting more and more in the way of the teacher. They try to be very kind and nice to them but I understand that after a while you would like your own classroom back to it just being you. Where you can shout and “gaan te keere” without feeling like you are being judged! I feel like the more familiar the kids get with you, the nicer things get in class between you and a select few, but the harder things get with the kids who are disruptive – they don’t care. To them you are not their teacher and you are old news. So, on we trudged in the mud every day (the place is really a mud bath when it rains like it did this week), and tried to make the most of a week that held nothing much in store for us but to sit in out library classroom and talk about our plans for the weekend or the color we would like to dye our hair next. I am having a little bit of a problem with my life orientation lessons because of the fact that there are very few actual lessons happening for life orientation at this school, and in terms of observations this has been a nightmare. Teaching life orientation has also proven to be a little difficult because the children simply do not want to work, and neither do they take the subject seriously. I must say, though, that they grade 11s are AWESOME to teach life orientation to because of how interactive they are. They also possess a level of maturity that many of the other grades do not, and I really thrive off this because we end up having meaningful discussions, and I am very proud of them. Unfortunately, since the timetable does not allow it I will not be able to use them for my crit lesson tomorrow!

We were allowed to leave when the children left for home but I stayed many days because I had to help the girls with their dance routine for the culture evening that was
“planned” for Tuesday evening. Leaving school earlier was a huge shock to my system! All of a sudden I had no idea what to do with my time from 12-3 each afternoon where I would usually be in class helping with this or that. I was genuinely worried about how I will react to having a whole lot of time on my hands. I also anticipate long crocodile tears when I leave because even though I look at some children and I feel heat boiling in my temples and my ears burning from dislike, I know I will miss them all collectively and I know that I will think with fond memories about the few that really made my time there worth it. I know that previously in this post I sounded very begrudging, which was really just a result of feeling underappreciated and ill-treated by some, but now, thinking back on those who really make me smile with their kind words, letters and fixed eyes upon me I can’t wait to go to school tomorrow!

This week will be my last week at school and I hope it ends on a beautiful note. I can’t wait to see the girls perform the dance I taught them, and I hope that at the end of the week I check in with an update of the millions of chocolates I have received! Haha! 

Week SEVEN already!!

This has been my seventh week in Luckhoff Senior Secondary, and like every other week, the time flies by! By now my body wakes me up at the crack of dawn on weekends, and I wish it would do the same during the week, although I must say that waking up at 6:30 isn't the blasted pain it once was. I've been having a good time with the children and I feel myself bonding with them - they're growing on me like weeds in a corn field!

When I think about the fact that I only have 2 more weeks left at the school it fills me with both excitement (I'm being real here) as well as an acute sense of dread for the fact that these faces I have grown to love are no longer going to be before me every single day anymore! I also have anxiety at the idea of my many hours in the day that will be left open like a gaping hole, devoid of much to do but my coursework! I spoke to my mother about this and she told me to calm down and take things as they come. I will get used to the free time in between classes again and learn to love it as I once did. I enjoy the attention I get from the little grade 8s who make me feel very pretty in the way they are always in awe of what I'm wearing each day. I need to remember that whatever I wear I need to consider very carefully because I am being watched like a hawk! They are very endearing, I love the little grade 8s who still have the glow of childhood on their skin. Everybody is so fascinated at me coming to school each day on my poegie and ask me for lifts every day!

I had my crit lesson this week on Wednesday and I must say, it has been a while since I was that nervous. I chose the grade 11s for my lesson and I chose them strategically because of how much easier they are to handle. they are also a small class which made the personally getting to know each child much easier than the lower grades where the classes are much bigger. One huge set-back for my crit lesson was the fact that the grade 11s were so busy practicing their dances that they were doing for life orientation that they did not hear the bell and as a result of this they came 15 minutes late! I almost lost my mind! This however, came in use when the lecturer had to give me a mark for diadatic contingencies! He said that I handled the pressure well. I just calmed myself and jumped into my work. I did a poem with them called "The wild doves at Louis Trichardt" which is a poem that I did in grade 11 too. I had a brilliant teacher who made the lesson very interesting for me and I was hoping to give them the same kind of interesting deliverance. I felt a little bit of pressure because I wanted them to like it as much as I did! They seemed to grasp the poem and many of them presented ideas to me that I was wowed about - these kids are actually so smart! I enjoyed the lesson and my lecturer said it was a very good lesson, too.

We had a feedback session afterwards where he commended me on my ability to use the kids' lifewords in my explanation of the poem. I made sure I used references that they would be familiar with in my execution of the poem and as a result of this, the poem seemed to come alive to them. Although I am doing my PGCE, I really want to teach primary school but my lecturer told me that I could very well do high school too, he thought I was good enough. Huge validation! I was so proud of the grade 11s who made the lesson enjoyable to teach too. I went to them the next morning and thanked them for being such good sports! I had a good week and hope that the last few days will be wonderful (that's ten more school days, FYI - Yes I'm keeping tabs!!!)

Week Six Wrap Up

There is nothing that flies as fast as a week in a school. Here I am, in the end of my sixth week at a school and still surviving. One incident that stood out to me this week was rather eye-opening. While helping a few boys doing their work during the class I had my back turned towards the naughty boys who refuse to take out a single book. Like I have said before, I work with those who want to work. I felt these boys throwing me with pen caps. I was extremely annoyed but realized that all they really want from me is my attention - but not the positive type of attention. These boys are the type who take great pleasure out of seeing a teacher loose their cool. I knew this and was determined not to fall into their trap. It took everything I had not to turn around and do something to them. I calmed myself and continued working. AGAIN.
Another pen cap thrown against my back. Let us bear in mind that these are not accidental tosses. These are deliberate and with ill intent. I don't know what I have ever done to harm them or cause them to want to treat me with such disrespect. I have no idea. The sad thing is, These are the boys that I used to pay lots of attention to because I felt that they were misunderstood cases and I was determined to get through to them on a level that they are not familiar with. It really hurts that they did this to me. AGAIN.

Third time a pen cap hits me. I ignore.

FOURTH time they threw me with a big crumpled up ball of paper against my head. This set me the hell off. The teacher was teaching but at that moment I was so upset I stopped her mid sentence - which is something I never do - to notify her of the boys who have been throwing things at me. They denied it and actually blamed me and told me that I was targeting them and made ME feel bad for blaming them! I have never been exposed to such people! I have never been exposed to such a blatant show of disrespect and dishonor. I had no idea what to do so I told their teacher. The reason this kind of behaviour goes on is because nothing gets done to them and to this day they have not apologized and continue to disrupt the class like it's their job. I told my parents about this and they made sure I told the principal. I went to their grade head, told him with them standing there and still they denied it to my face as if I was stupid. He just gave them a talking to. Still, nothing happens to these boys. Action needs to be taken against them but the school lets things like this slide for some reason I am not even sure of. I don't know what to do but I pray to God that he sends me to a good school one day, with a sound discipline system. These things should not happen in a school environment.

On the up-side, I gave 3 very good lessons for Life Orientation this week which I thoroughly enjoy because of the fact that the grade 11s are so chilled. I really enjoy them. They are so responsive. I chose them for my English Crit lesson coming up this week Wednesday!
This week was the marking of the last 40 days that the matrics will ever be having at school again - they hope! I remember saying goodbye to school, thankful that I never have to spend another day at a school... The irony. The matrics came in their casual clothing and I found myself greeting them as "hello Ma'am" until I caught onto the fact that these were in fact school children and not parents who came to school to see the principal. I swear the kids look older and older every year! The cultural week seems to be in full swing as the ballet girls and I are hard at work on our dance for the evening.

Three More weeks to go - Let the count down begin!

I Suppose I'm a Teabag'

They say that women are like teabags, that we don't know how strong we are until we get put into hot water. How true this saying is. I must say that over the past few weeks I would have never imagined I would be sitting in class with the type of kids, in the type of school environment that I do now. I'm being brutally honest. We all dream of teaching at Rhenish or La Rochelle, we all have dreams of an easy teaching experience and who is to say those schools don't have their own problems? We dream of a school where children drink in our every word and there's no need to shout or reprimand 1000000 times every day. we DREAM of comfort, of staff-rooms with coffee flowing and air-con running. BUT, will we grow? Will we become the best person we could possibly be in perfect conditions?  I come from a privileged middle-class background, my parents both teachers, and I was blessed to go to a good school and to be surrounded with a certain type of mindset and mentality. The idea that education is my only way upwards and towards the independence that I so hungrily craved was etched into my mind before I knew what I wanted to do with my life. And yet, I struggle to find that school of thought in the environment I am currently situated. I grew up in a bit of a bubble, and BOY has my bubble been burst.

I have learnt to swim in an environment that I never thought I could survive in (and of cause the tuck-shop has helped me through this in my neediest times - I am NOT kidding here - it's been a huge crutch). An environment where the leadership is lacking and the children feel it within the school. An environment filled with drugs, bunking and ill-discipline, where a culture of learning is not fostered, and this makes me sad. I have been exposed to things I only heard about from other people BUT here I am, swimming and loving the trip this is taking me on. I am one of those people who are able to adapt to adversity (just don't douse me in it!!!) and grow. I have been cat-called more times than I can count, disrespected and unappreciated, but I still wake up every morning with a will to go on because deep down I feel like somehow I am making a difference to someone. That somehow I can possibly be that role model to a child, someone they can look up to.

I have become attached to some of the children, and surprisingly they aren't the boffins that one would expect. i have grown attached to little group of boys who to me are the cutest little things on this darn earth. they are greatly overlooked and left to fend for themselves in the back of the classroom., their teacher doesn't expect much from them in terms of work and as a result of this does not even check their homework. they tend to be a little chatty and this is what initially brought me to sitting with them. they're little boys, far smaller than they should be for grade 8 and I suspect they come from impoverished backgrounds. by sitting with them to keep them quiet and working I realized that they are just normal little boys who have so much character. they like me and the stickers I give them when they do their homework and try hard to impress me, because they like me but - I suspect - ABOVE ALL they think I'm pretty - and who doesn't want to impress a pretty lady? I enjoy working with them as a group and I see the tendency within me to gravitate to the needy ones, the ones who need help and attention which is so scarce in a large class. I hope that I inspire them as much as they inspire me to be kind and loving to people I never thought I would build a relationship with. I'm a work in progress but really I think I like who I'm becoming. This teaching practice is beginning to mean more to me than those 8 lessons per subject.

We are still hard at work on our spiritual dance for the Cultural Day which will be taking place on the 11th of September, and the ballet group seem to be very excited and I enjoy working with them. The school has announced that there will be two interim principals until the end of the year, when a new principal will be announced. This week has been a long one for me and I am so glad that I can go on to a brand new one. Keyword to remember for the week: Teabag.

Like Headless Chickens...

WOW! On Tuesday afternoon the staff was called in to an urgent meeting in the staff room after school which excited the inner drama queen inside me. I was so curious to know what had happened. On Wednesday morning the school started at half past 8 and we were sitting in our little library area that is designated to us students, wondering what the heck was going on in the staff room. as it turned out, the principal had just decided that enough is enough, she was quitting her position as head of the school and reverting to her old position. the staff was in a tizz. they were like a chicken without a head (excuse the pun), everybody having different opinions about Mrs X and her quitting the job. NOBODY wanted to take on the responsibility of being the head of Luckhoff. NOBODY. i had to remind myself that I should not get caught up in all the hype and just do my job. we were asked to keep the news from the children but naturally the children knew that something was up. children have the remarkable ability to suss something out, which is what they did, and before long we had some questions asking if Mrs X had resigned. I have no idea of the inner workings of the school and in my opinion since nobody wants to take on the responsibility of being principal, nobody has the right to judge Mrs X, even if her job as principal was wanting.

The controversy aside, I have been having a wonderful week. Us as students have organised a week of activities for the girls at the school and I was part of the Beauty portfolio where I spoke about the importance of inner beauty and how important it is for us as women to stand together and be kind and supportive of one another. The girls seemed to take in what I had to say and the fact that they chose to be there and listen made it so much easier to manage the girls since they wanted to listen. We all decided to make something nice for the girls during break and on Wednesday night I baked THREE huge cakes for the girls, which got some raving reviews! I really enjoy working with girls, I wonder if it might be one of my callings :)

In terms of classroom management and teaching, I can see a definite preference developing in me. I love teaching grades 10 and 11 where I find myself dreading, ABSOLUTELY dreading the grade 9s! The grade 8s are still super cute and I find myself managing them well in class. I have taken to this small group of little boys in my gr8 classes who need help urgently in terms of their work. While the teacher teaches the general class I would work remedially with those few and I find that it works for them. I just need to remind myself not to baby them too much and make them lazy to try and understand things themselves. I love teaching them though, they respond well to me and I feel some kind of motherliness coming out of me. One of the naughty boys, Bulumko, has turned over a new leaf and I use the respect he has for me to get him to work and try to impress me. I have taken him on as my project and I will keep my readers updated on his progress because not only do I see him as a little boy who needs love, attention and kind work, I also see him as someone who has so much potential that the other teachers do not see because he is very talkative and has a lot to say. Also, he doesn't respond well to people shouting at him which brings out attitudes that I don't feel are native to his character. I love teaching and I can see more and more that teaching isn't teaching a class or teaching a curriculum but it really is teaching a CHILD. Many of them, all with their idiosyncrasies, personalities and quirks. working closely with them opens them up and I experience each child with enthusiasm and intrigue - IF THEY LET ME. Many children sadly come with the highest brick walls around them from their backgrounds, which is SO SAD. And then there's me like a woodpecker, pecking at their crusts.

Woodpecker. Miss Woodpecker.

On to a new week!

Like steam-trains we chug on...

Phew, once again what a week! As a follow-up to the drugs and gangsterism post I made last week, I am happy to say that something is being done. The teachers are patrolling the school grounds better than ever before. I can see change happening which makes my heart glad. There are still a few children who come to class high as kites which makes me very sad. They think they are sooo slick by speaking in their code language for the drugs and being high but they forget that I am only 22, I've seen enough and heard enough about that side of life to know what they mean. I confronted one boy about this and asked him if his respect is really SO low for me that they will blatantly speak about their drugs in code word they think I wouldn't be able to pick up or glean from the context right in front of me. He was shocked and denied it to my face of cause. Of cause. I however am sad to sat that I have developed a kind of tougher skin being in this environment for a while now, where I have made the conscious decision to be there for those who need me and want me to teach, and that those who make the conscious decision to come to class high or smelling like smoke will always be there. I need to use my energy where it is most beneficial and not waste it on something that won't result in the greater good, because there are children who are willing to learn and participate and they outnumber those who do not. It is not fair to then neglect the masses who pay to be there just so that I can give a lecture to one, two or five children who think life and school is a joke. SO! Onward and forward!

I presented my first ever poetry classes this week and boy were they nerve-wrecking. Because of the fact that I love literature so much as well as teaching it, I felt a lot of pressure to do the work justice. I also had a brilliant English teacher throughout high school and to feel like I had to be something like her was also so much pressure that I felt I unnecessarily placed on myself. I enjoyed the literature lessons endlessly. I taught gr11s a poem called "The Meeting" by William Wadsworth Longfellow which is a beautiful poem to say the least. I felt like I really helped the learners understand what the poet was trying to bring to the reader. I enjoyed it so much that I sped through the lesson and my mentor teacher told me afterwards that I had to slow down because it looked like some of the kids struggled to get down what they had to. I felt very bad about this because in no way would I want to hinder their learning by being too fast! I decided that in the next lesson given to the gr10s I would do better - and I could tell that in being slower and more thourough I did way better than my first lesson - which is understandable. I was very proud of that lesson and still am. The grade 10 learners however, as well as the gr11s caused me some concern in that they did not take many notes, even after I had asked them to and expressed the importance, which was scary to think that they do not care enough to write things down that would help them now as well as in future. I do understand, though. Nobody is in the mood to write down things, and children can get very bored very quickly, but -- Work is work!

After a long week of having to prepare lessons (which is very tiring!) I had to honour my commitments to teach dance to some girls for the cultural week. I was pooped after school as anybody would be and in no mood to teach dance to anybody. I just wanted to go home and sleep but I made a commitment. As soon as we started, my hunger faded away and as we were doing one of he things I love the most - dancing - I cold feel how I slowly came alive again after the soul-deadening day at school. Since its a small group of girls who are very respectful and lovely to work with, I found myself enjoying the lesson very much! It's important to have something like this to bring yourself back to life after a tough school day else who knows what might happen to you! Remember to always take part in something or get involved in something that makes you feel human again and not the monster you might feel yourself becoming. I am thankful for moments like that when I can be that Carefree Nicole again when I dance both in teaching others to dance as well as dancing in my private time - it keeps me sane. Here's to another week of teaching! May week four four times better than we've hoped.

IS school still a place of learning?

What an intense week this last one has been for me. When I look back I wonder how I made it. As a student teacher we want to do things properly and when we plan lessons we tend to PLAN the hell out of them. They can take up to four hours to compile, if you include an activity and well-thought out lesson plan material and ideas to keep today's children interested. I had five lessons, some of which I had to repeat to another class in the grade. Five lessons over five days meant planning into the wee hours of the morning most days. It was exhausting but I absolutely love teaching so it just seemed to be worth it in the end. I had to give one class a serious talk about their behaviour in my classes. Their register teacher had been so upset with them because of how badly they had been behaving in the last week, and they did the same in my class with their incessant talking and devil-may-care attitude towards their work. When they found out that their behaviour was causing me to do poorly in a lesson that is being assessed (yes, they don't know that us student teachers are actually there to be ASSESSED), they changed their attitude because although they were chatty, they seem to genuinely like me, and continued to behave in the rest of the class, for which I am grateful. I thanked them afterwards for understanding.

One thing that stood out to me this week was the fact that there are so many things going on in that school that the teachers are aware of but choose to turn a blind eye to because either they know that they are fighting a loosing battle or because to take action is simply too much effort. Once the rain had penetrated some of the prefabs that I work in, we were forced to move to the old section of the school that had been scheduled for demolition but still stood for some reason. These classrooms obscure the view of the back of the school and the abandoned tennis courts behind the school. As I was sitting in class one break time I saw something that ignited an anger within me - streams of children walking on a mission to the abandoned tennis court walls. I had one thought at what they were doing and I was right. I decided to go and investigate and to my horror, the smell of marijuana hung heavily in the air with cigarette smoke and who knows what else. I took one look at the mass of about 80 children hanging in masses hidden by the abandoned tennis court walls. They become high during breaks and then we have to deal with children who are absolutely unable to take anything in. The smell of marijuana stinks of failure and lost opportunities.

I spoke to my mentor teacher about this and she told me that they are aware of the problem but something is being done. The worst punishment a child can get would be detention which they seem to enjoy because all their friends are there too. My heart breaks for these children in masses throwing their lives away for a fleeting feeling. It makes no sense to me. The next day I saw that not only are these children smoking weed, they get SOLD weed by people who sneak in through the gates and sell these drugs to school children. Men in hoodies, who are obviously gangsters. One I saw walking with a scissors - not to cut out pictures from a magazine I can guarantee you. It just breaks my heart because there are young girls on the grounds, and impressionable young boys who are put at risk by these gangsters and strangers on a school premises that should be a safe haven for any child. This is totally unacceptable and I intend to write a letter to the head teacher to report what is going on.
My heart breaks for these children and I feel like I have my hands tied. Is school still a place of learning or just a place children come to smoke, socialize, get high and do the bare minimum? Am I looking at this the wrong way? What can be done? Where do we go from here?

Wrap up of my very first week as a "Miss" and "Juffie"

T

his week has been a whorl wind of an experience. Arriving at school I was overwhelmed to say the least. He kids seemed so unruly to me, I felt as though I had absolutely no control over their shouting and screaming. These kids showed absolutely no sign of wanting to work, which disheartened me, to say the least. This however, was not an accurate representation of who they are as a school. I had to revisit my experiences and in so doing I realised that the reason for their unruliness was obvious. They had just come from a long holiday of doing as they pleased to having to sit in restricting desks and being made to keep quiet. Understandably! I battle to get myself into gear after a long holiday, imagine being just 14 and having to sit still when all you want to do is excitedly chat to your buddies on the other side of the class about the holiday!

Throughout the week I saw how they gradually tamed down to the point where they were almost entirely manageable. I must say that over the course of the week I have grown to like these children whom I dreaded seeing on the second day. So much change in one week. I have grown used to the teacher and her teaching style and realize that everybody has their own way of teaching and hers is different but custom made to who she is. I had the opportunity of presenting y first ever lesson to a high school class. The class was to be repeated to the other class in the grade which sounds simple enough although in practice it lacks this simplicity. I found myself trying very hard to perfectly replicate the lesson to the other class and felt very frustrated when I missed something or the children didn’t react in the way that the other class ha read. I had slightly more discipline issues with the grade 8F class than I did with the G class. The astonishing thing though is that the naughty class (just look how I'm positioning them! tisk tisk!) produced the best work! I was so glad that they got the message that I was trying to bring to them about descriptive essay writing. The G class however completely missed the point, with some boys not having down anything at the end of the period which was frustrating since I gave them ample time to complete what they had to do. I followed up with the today, Friday about what they did wrong ad what I really liked about their work. Besides simple issues like the distinction between too and to or their, there and they're, they wrote as though they were writing a diary entry. This however cannot be generalised to the whole class as some did perform and came up with delightful pieces to read. I marked the pieces and wrote some constructive comments, some of which can be viewed in my portfolio.

Initially at the beginning of the week I was terrified of the classes because I didn’t really know how to approach the situation. It turns out that the influence I have over the kids is far greater than I could have imagined. I was always kind to them but ha to remember that they are not my friends, since I am someone who enjoys being playful a laughing. I had to remember that there is a time to be friendly and a time to be stern, something that I am learning how to manage more and more every single day. I had the grade 10's today for a reading period where I read to them. They seemed to really enjoy this because I can remember that for most of the period you could hear a pin drop! I gave others a chance to read when I felt tired and gave as many as I cold the chance to participate, especially those who seemed to not be paying much attention.

There was this one boy who sat in front of me who was lying with his head on his arms. My instinct told me to let him be, but when it came to his chance to read I gently touched him and asked him to read, which he did with no problems. After this I could see that even though he had his head down, he was paying attention. At the end of the period I jokingly told him that it looks like he got his afternoon nap in! He is a very shy boy who had been bullied throughout his high school carer so his demeanour is that of a child who doesn’t want to be seen. In my showing him kindness and respect this seemed to have opened him up towards me which made me feel so honoured. He told me that he wasn’t feeling well and I wished him well so that he could come back next week feeling better. Shyly he said "miss has a nice voice" and I thanked him. On his departure he gave me a hug. To this I had mixed emotions because we are told that we cannot touch a student, that we have to keep our distance at all times, but I felt hat this boy needed this kind of affirmation from me and I understood an appreciated his display of affection. I spoke to their teacher later and asked me if that’s normal and she said that he has had some issues with bullying and that I should feel good that he came to greet me like that. I felt so validated as a teacher, as though even though we have to deal with nonsense from unruly children, it’s these moments that make it all worthwhile. If I could make that kind of impact on even just one child, it makes it all worth it in the end. Looking forward to seeing those kids again, and I mean this with all the sincerity in my heart. I love being a student-teacher.

Wake-up Call!!!

Wow. All that I can say is wow. I had been to supervise at my father and mother’s schools before so I had an idea of what I was to expect, but then I got to school and could see the vast difference there is between primary school and high school. I was told to prepare myself for the kids who are sassy, hormonal, clowns, and hard to get into gear. Heck, when the teacher told them that it was time to work I felt that same sinking feeling I used to feel when I was in school and my laughter and fun was abruptly cut off by that four letter word, “work”. Not something any kid wants to hear when they’re clowning around with their besties or chatting about how “I was sick and so I gave it to Kyle” – in reference to how a grade 10 girl was talking about her transmitting the flu to her boyfriend, via kissing is the best guess I could come up with (I might look like I’m not listening but watch out for me, I’M A MASTER at dropping eves), but, I digress.

On my poegie I arrived at school and the teaching body was very friendly. I saw quite a few younger teachers which was slightly comforting in a way, knowing that I wouldn’t be working with a whole warehouse of old geysers was refreshing! (I joke!). I must say that after today, all the respect I could have ever had for teaching has unquestionably quadrupled. I was allocated a teacher who is in her second year teaching and she and I seem to be getting on very well seeing as the age gap isn’t too large at all. Since the school is relatively new in terms of English Home Language being offered to learners, the grades only went up to grade 11, no matrics.

Class after class I could see the distinct difference in grades and their general rapport. I noticed that the grade 8s and 9s are ridiculously childish and will laugh at a bag of potatoes if allowed. They were terribly hard to get into order and into the mood of studying. They generally lacked manners and the ability to take the work- or themselves seriously. The respect they had for their teacher was minimal if judging from the standpoint of their behaviour. Their ability to be influenced by others in their class was through the roof, and off the charts. I have never seen this domino effect in full effect until today and boy, is it infectious.

I felt that as a student teacher I had to remember my place in a class and not say anything unless asked to contribute, because after all, the class and all its contents is under the dominion of their teacher, and in giving random inputs I felt I would be out of place. However, the one class of grade 8s just brought me to saying something. I regretted it afterwards. Not because of it being wrong or me saying something horrible but because I felt like I was being “that teacher” who tells kids to be quiet. The one the kids don’t like, and it is quite sad that I still somehow find myself wanting their approval in some way. I need to work on that. The teaching style of my mentor I found to be questionable at times. Though I am in no position to judge, not having had a single class to teach in my life, I must add that perhaps writing down memos on the board for a test they had written in June exams wasn’t the best way of dealing with their mistakes. Some girls asked for their papers back so that they could see what they had done wrong, which the teacher chose to not return to them yet. I would have rather discussed the paper with them and have them write down the corrections as they came to terms with the mistakes they made than have them spoon-fed answers, like robots. She did not always look very prepared for her classes as she looked to be searching in the text books for things they could read. This left a lot of time for the children’s minds to be idle and for the talking and disruptive behaviour to take flight. I feel that when it comes to younger children, their minds need to be kept constantly busy, which is something that she didn’t really excel at in doing.

The grade 10s and 11s were notably more organized, though there were a few learners who were class clowns as usual, to the point where I had to take a long stick from one of the boys. I saw they were vying for my attention as they were continually looking for my eyes when they did something they knew was wrong. The grade 10s were very engaging and the grade 11s had a whale of a time talking about Orwell’s iconic piece: Animal Farm. Although they digressed immensely at times I could see that they were interested in the subject matter and were having a good time, being quirky and pushing the boundaries with their teacher, inch by inch. The teacher offered them extra classes and told them that she was always available, something that I found to be wonderful.

All in all, I had a good day. I could see that it was the first day after a holiday and the kids were bursting from their seams! Hopefully tomorrow will be better, calmer and more productive.                                                             

- Nicole 

What is digital pedagogy???

What is digital pedagogy?

Let's break it up to make it just a little bit easier to grasp:

Digital:  in this sense the word is in reference to the use of electronic media and aid.

Pedagogy: pedagogy is the art of teaching.

thus: digital pedagogy can be said to be the art of teaching using electronic media within the classroom as an aid or supplement to the lesson you are presenting as a teacher.

You're welcome.